Friday, May 1, 2009

happy May day

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From RevGalsBlog - Friday Five

1. Are ritual markings of birth marriage and death important to you? I find funerals still interesting - and I'm growing as we have "funeral immersion" at times here. We had about 1 funeral per week last year, although the pace is slower this year. Interesting enough, the most concrete criticism at yesterday's evaluation was about a funeral that I handled - well, made some unfortunate steps due to withheld information by the family. I thought I had made my amends at that time. (Well, when you are planning a funeral and speaking to 'the wife', and no one says anything about the first family, and the obit doesn't come out until the day of the funeral (they ran a announcement only) and it's VBS week . . . ) One mistake - 25 thank yous. You know which one gets the press.

I feel less happy about current baptismal practices. For so many of the people I deal with it's an obligatory ritual, less about God, church and discipleship than welcoming a child to family, about being respectable in someone's eyes, and an occasion for party and gifts. I do the pre-baptismal meetings and just haven't found a way to convey the wonder of this moment. I'd like to make a DVD sometime.

2. Share a favourite liturgy/ practice. Part of me is so moved on Ash Wednesday. It's the phyiscality of the gesture of placing the ashes, the equality, the solemnity, the beauty of so many coming - for their own reasons - to receive this mark. I love enpowering lay people to be the markers - I think that blessing is a great form of priesthood of all.


3. If you could invent ( or have invented) a ritual what is it for? At the time of my early hysterectomy I wanted a ritual to say goodbye to the womb. Burn sage grass, dance under the moon (it was december!) or something. I did drink tea with a friend. But we need an end to childbearing - hope of childbearing ritual - dealing with the grief and relief and joy in the future.

4. What do you think of making connections with neo-pagan / ancient festivals? Have you done this and how? Not too sure. But on Monday am meeting with a young couple who wants to include hand-fasting in their wedding. We'll talk about including God and the grace of Christ in this ritual - which I understand is a pagan/Celtic tradition. I see it as a version of vows (they 'tie the knot, or others tie for them) - and as Christians we place all our vows under God's grace - not just our own efforts. We also need to address the 'conditional' aspect of the knots.

5. Celebrating is important, what and where would your ideal celebration be? I wish I could be at my funeral.

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3 comments:

Dr. Laura Marie Grimes said...

How awesome that you share the ministry of ashes with laypeople....I have done that in college (in a prayer group) and in grad school (we were in a women's dorm and I suggested we have a service of the Word with lay presider so someone from our community could do it--and got picked!)

I think you are so right about the need for rites of passage for the times of women's lives--that keeps coming up in people's posts. Let's create them for ourselves and others....

Elaine (aka...Purple) said...

I agree with your comment on baptisms...I continually rely on the Spirit to do its work...even when I cannot see it. Great play.

MaineCelt said...

My partner and I created a handfasting ritual when we could find no clergypersons willing to officiate at a commitment ceremony for fear they'd lose their own ordained status. Here's what I used as our "words of institution":

"Handfasting is an ancient and time-honoured form of betrothal or wedding common throughout the world. In rural Scotland, where priests were few and far between, a couple would make their own vows with God and all of Creation as their witnesses. As they pledged their loyalty, they would take each other's hands and wrap them in a symbolic act of binding. These vows were understood as a true--and binding--marriage contract, recognized and honoured by the full community.
We long for the day when all people, and all communities, may publicly declare, honour, and celebrate the love that nourishes them most deeply. Until then, let this handfasting be our declaration. Let us be witnesses, with all of Creation. Let us share in the blessing of God's creative, redeeming, sustaining gift of Love!"