up & running

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I haven't posted much this summer. There are various reasons for that.

• I moved my office from one building to another. It feels odd and still awkward in the new place, around the staff that I used to see only a couple a times a week. Now I'm out of the conversations in the old place, and not in conversations in the new place.
• We went on vacation right after that move. Vacation was great and I continue to work on my personal journal, casting out the line for my own vocational reality and personal peace.
• We had to move our son out of his apartment - I am not paying rent any more. He had trashed the apartment, and it was a hard slog through that issue, both physically and emotionally.
  
• We have been doing a sermon series at church, on purchased material, so I haven't had to write original sermons. There's enough there for another post, for sure.
• I've been doing more Facebook.
  

The two identities that I have to work at now are Pastor and Parent. As parent - DS will be 21 soon, and we are girding up for cutting him free. He has so few skills, so few resources and no motivation. Of course I worry. But he also doesn't hear advice.

He has court on Wednesday, and at least I think he should cut his hair and find nice clothes to wear (and, no, don't take them from your dad's closet). But - this is what most parents don't understand - I can't tell him that. His response would be either: anger, silence, or mocking. Of the three, silence is the most typical these days. And, we are at fault after the fact, always. That's the borderline personality for you.

As pastor I am still trying to find my place, my emphasis, my 'thing'. I feel marginalized a lot - I'm not as visible as others, and not 'included.' (Dear God, I sound like a teenager!). But it struck me that there is freedom on the margins, and perhaps it isn't such a bad place to do ministry.

More on all of this later.
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