my sink runneth over

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Yes, I am handy-woman! After months of living with a stuck bathroom sink stopper, I had enough energy and interest to get a pair of pliers, stick my head under there and figure out what was wrong.

I even went to the Re-store and found the right size pivot sticky-thing in the bin of various parts. And I replaced it. The sink leaks a little, but I'm pretty proud of myself. I can always just superglue the old cottage cheese container under the leak. (just kidding). Now I have to find plumber's tape, undo the connection, but the tape on and tighten it all up again.

Thank goodness for Google and diy sites.
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Blessed

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This was not what was preached - exactly. The manuscript never got to church with me - so I jumped onto the Holy Spirit trampoline and bounced. It seemed to go well at the 8:00 a.m. service.
Of course, I never got to it at the 10:30 - I heard Retired Pastor Friend go "I was listening to the sermon at the early service and it went like this . . ."

Advent 4C, Dec. 20, 2009
Luke 1 - the visitation and Magnificat

“Blessed” We don’t use that word much - it’s not part of our everyday imagination. We think about those who have enough - who appear to be happy - as blessed. We are ‘blessed’ with children - when they are small. But when they are grown - some of us would say we are blessed with our progeny if those sons and daughters have done okay - it is hard to say we are blessed when the kid is out of work and living in the basement.

In some ways ‘blessed’ is also synonymous in America with luck and/or hard work. We are blessed to be healthy, to be white, to be Americans at all - to have all the benefits of our color and class and nation. America itself is called blessed - because we’ve had lots of resources to develop or exploit - because we’ve governed ourselves relatively freely and wisely over 200 years. So on a larger scale we are a blessed generation. Some understand themselves as blessed because they can look and see what they’ve accomplished, and they are satisfied.

But, but, there is always another side. - we may not think we are blessed - we have bad fortune, disappointments - our children turn do things differently than we would like - our good job disappears - our cherished institutions change. Our health gives way - the situation of a loved one becomes drastically different. Don’t feel quite as blessed, then, we don’t. And the world is uncomfortable with those who don’t seem to share in the good fortune, those who walk in darkness.

In our story we see two women meeting - they walk in light and approval, and they walk in the shadows of the world‘s disapproval. Many would have called Elizabeth blessed - after all, she has had her heart’s desire fulfilled - she’s now pregnant with her first child, although she’s getting up there in age. In her time and culture - she would be definitely be seen as blessed, as rewarded, as having God’s favor. So would her husband Zechariah, if he hadn’t been strangely quiet about the whole thing.

Mary, on the other hand - her situation is not quite as favorable. She’s still very young - she is only betrothed, not married, and she has this interesting story about being pregnant without knowing a man. She has rushed from her home, immediately after her vision of the angel Gabriel - and rushed to meet with the only person who might understand - her cousin Elizabeth, who has also been touched by God in a wonderful way.

This Gospel is the story of two miracles meeting for the first time. Both John and Jesus have now been conceived. John is more than six months along, we are told, and thus very capable of giving a swift kick or two to his mother, and Jesus has just been conceived. In fact, just prior to this text is the story in which Mary finds out about Elizabeth's pregnancy, and it is to rejoice with her kinswoman that she goes on this journey.
. . .

Mary is blessed - not because she’s had good luck, good favor, or good things are happening to her. She’s blessed because she’s heard the word of God - and believed it. And accepted it - she said yes - let it be to me the way you desire, God.

That is radically different from our usual way of talking. We usually say someone is blessed because of how their life has turned out. Not here - there is no judgment about God liking or not liking someone - about Good things happening to Good people, and when bad things happen - well. And that’s what we should be remembering in this season.

Mary’s state of being blessed, of being faithful - has nothing to do with human judgments upon her, and everything to do with the power of God. Here is the message in this story:
God is powerful - and that is true whether you have it all, or you have nothing. God is powerful and that is true whether you have smiling children at the Christmas tree, or a small and quiet day by yourself on Thursday.
God is powerful - and his power comes to each one who turns to him
- in joy and in sorrow,
in thanksgiving and in frustration,
in the best moments of our lives - and more significantly -

God’s power come to those who turn to him even when the world says they are not blessed.

Mary’s song makes this clear - he looks at the lowest down, the sad, the depressed, the poor, the helpless, the guilty, the have-nots - and they will receive blessing. While the British occupied India - Anglican priests were not to read or teach the Magnificat to the Indian people - it was too revolutionary. God’s word of power is revolutionary - it sets things upside down - it makes a poor teenager the mother of a king - and makes that king walk the most difficult road.

Elizabeth knew, rightly, that her cousin Mary was blessed - blessed for what was happening in and through her - even though the world couldn’t see that - and blessed for the faith Mary held in her heart.

When the world looks at us and thinks - unlucky, when the world looks and thinks - bad choices - when the world looks and thinks - there but for the grace of God go . . .
God looks and says . . . For you I was born. For you I came to Mary. For you this life was lived. To bless you - to offer to you solace in your grief and peace in your busy life - for you I am.

That is true blessing - knowing that God is powerful - thanks be to God.
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from kathleen Norris

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Monks have always insisted that we can in fact think about our thoughts and feelings, and consider how to act on them.

Acedia and Me, p. 151

Sounds obvious, doesn't it. But how often . . . And in our lectionary right now - we hear about the use of wealth, about adultery, marriage and sin, about welcoming or not welcoming the child, the stranger.

This may be one of the most difficult elements of maturity to appreciate. Growing up means not being at the mercy of one's thoughts and feelings.
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one of those Sundays

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It was one of those Sundays.

To start with - although I went to bed early, sober and tired, i had my usual disturbed sleep, which was not helped when Aquila was called out at 1 p.m and didn't come home again. I was up at 5:30 and no sweetie. He arrived as I was leaving the house. A sad story about a drunk driver.

Got to the church and we just had tons of stuff to cover. Installation of staff and council, remembering baptisms of kids - and I had to located the candles and water, etc.. We are working with a difficult person, and he was actually not difficult today. The bulb was out on the projector. We underestimated the number at that service and didn't run enough song sheets.

I have a 10 item list of stuff to follow up on.

God's blessings do rain - one of those things is a request for a baptism for a 5th grader.

In the midst of all the sad news in the world - there is light.
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last minute

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How do I do it? Two days ago I purchased all sorts of toiletries to put in DS stocking, and now I can't find them. How do I lose things so quickly? and frequently?

Famous story. We are moving out from church #3 and in a cupboard I find presents from 2 years before! I thought I had purchased a sweatshirt!

Porridge was good this a.m. Bob's Red Mill 5 Grain with honey and half & half. Close to the food of the angels.

Christmas Day sermon - on Gospel & Longfellow's "I heard the Bells on Christmas Day" is done.

Christmas Eve has been refreshed and rehearsed once.

Lil Sis is here with a cough. She will stay home and drink tea this p.m., and wait for us with soup.

It's Snowing again!

His Majesty thinks - great, my mattress is home today.

Merry Christmas world (and my few readers.)
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breathing & sermon

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I am actually home for dinner. In time to cook the dinner. It is a bag of something from the freezer, but even that contributes to the cause of emptying the freezer.

I'll go to the library tonight, because the book I was trying to read just isn't keeping my attention, and I would hate to be without a good book during the quiet hours of Christmas.

Sometime I'll think about my sermons. I don't want to re-use my Christmas Eve sermon from last year - in structure, it's a lot like the one I want to do on Christmas Day. I could re-use it, I'm preaching at a different church

The Christmas Eve sermon last year used "Infant Holy, Infant Lowly" as a frame to tell the shepherd's view of the story.

The Christmas Day sermon will use "I heard the bells on Christmas day" to reflect upon our adult perception that Christmas joy is just beyond our grasp. And it is if we think that all has to be well, peace has to be concrete on earth, etc. But Longfellow's hope is that the bells themselves are a sign that hope lives.

They really aren't that much alike, are they?

I guess I don't want to memorize and sing all that I did last year. Yes, this was all from memory, including the Gospel reading.

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Christmas Eve – Dec. 24, 2007

Ah, what a great vision is called up in those words – long ago, a woman, a man, a tiny infant. There is an intimacy about the first act of the story – the three of them, despite old prophecies and angel dreams and visitations – the reality is that a baby has been born, cleaned, swaddled for comfort, and finally is at rest. Feeding trough or manager, whether it was in a cave or stable or perhaps even outdoors, under a canvas lean-to, we aren’t sure. The details we have added don’t really matter.

Hold your breath for a moment – it is the peacefulness of the scene that enchants – that the Savior of the world, the One hoped for, the Messiah promised of old – enters so quietly, so humbly. It is quiet and tiny, this royal birth. No one important knows about him, only his parents know what has been said about this one, only they know what that name – Jesus – really signifies. Like Joshua of old, he will save his people. Even his parents will not understand how that salvation will come about.

1 Infant holy, infant lowly, for his bed a cattle stall;
oxen lowing, little knowing Christ the child is Lord of all.

Then the second act – and the news cannot be kept secret any longer. Others must soon learn what is happening. Shepherds – drowsy in the night-time watch for wild dogs and bolder thieves – find themselves looking at a sky full of miracles. No, not stars, not comets, not new moons or even the northern lights – but a figure of such beauty and power that it could only invoke terror – the ANGEL OF THE LORD, with the brilliance that is that glory of the LORD shining. And of all things that ANGEL says: Don’t be afraid. The news is good news – the best news of all.

Swiftly winging, angels singing, bells are ringing, tidings bringing:
Christ the child is Lord of all! Christ the child is Lord of all!

See, says the angel, “over in the city, the city in which the great king David was born and the great king David was chosen by the prophet Samuel and anointed with oil, in that city, another child has been born – the Savior, who is God’s Anointed One, the Lord. But not in a palace, and not in a great house, but you will know it is him because he is still wrapped in swaddling clothes and he’ll be lying in a feeding trough.”

And not content with stunning the shepherds with that announcement, all the angels in God’s heavenly army show up to sing the highest praises of God – the heavenly chorus only before heard by the prophets and the visionary are shared – Glory to God in the highest! Peace has come to earth!

2 Flocks were sleeping, shepherds keeping, vigil till the morning new
saw the glory, heard the story, tidings of a gospel true.

Now in the third act the shepherds check with each other – realize they have all had the same vision – which probably calmed them down a bit - and decide to go to town. We tend to think that they found the babe right away, but we only know they went in haste, not that they found that child quickly. They had to check every feeding trough in the city. Any babies in this one? In that one? And when they burst upon the startled Mary and Joseph – Hey, guys, here! Baby, swaddled, in a manager. This is the one!

Maybe they were ready to give up, before they found that last box filled with hay and oats and baby. But here it was – this odd combination of infant tiny and humble circumstances. The vision in the field has been confirmed, the angels were not hallucinations, and that message was true – God has done something wonderful! God has sent a Savior, a Christ, a Lord.

Mary and Joseph had been quietly adoring their child, as parents will. They had been wondering about all the circumstances that had brought them to this place – Angel visits and the empire’s taxes, but they had been just the three of them, no one else knew. Until those shepherds arrived. Lady, do we have a story for you!

A story that began then, and was completed 33 years later, or rather, a story that has never ended. For we are like those shepherds, every Christmas, delighted to hear the good news from the angels: Christ is born! God has acted! And the world is different. The world is different, because Christ was born. The world is different because the followers of Christ – all of us who love this story, are different. We cling to a truth, that our God became human, a child, a man – and loved enough to teach us how to live as children of God, how to serve each other, to turn the other cheek, to open our hearts to the poor, to forgive as we have been forgiven. Our God loved us so much he sent his only begotten son to die for us. Loved us enough to promise to be with us until the very end. And that is GOOD NEWS.

Thus rejoicing, free from sorrow, praises voicing, greet the morrow:
Christ the child was born for you! Christ the child was born for you!

Text: Polish carol; tr. Edith M. G. Reed, 1885-1933, alt
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on a scale of one to ten

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On a scale of one to ten, one being crawl-into-bed and sob and hide the knives and ten being in-love-with-the-universe, last Tuesday was about a 3. Which isn't good. I even spoke to the eagle about 'tracking' my moods.

The trick with the chronic/major depression as I experience it is that I can slip down and down and since I am getting depressed, it all seems to fit, all seems to be the way it should be. But it's not okay, it's an under-functioning of my happiness receptors.

So Aquila will ask again in a few days. I don't buy the 'feel bad for three days and see the dr.' pattern. If I'm at 2 or 3 for a week or two, then I worry.

(And why should I not see my dr.? I really dislike the whole 'change the meds' experience on SSRI - I had the withdrawal symptoms for weeks last time. My current meds have dealt well with the depression and the fibromygalia)

And yesterday and today have been about 5. Which is okay. Not great. 5 is snow-and-cold-and-a-little-too-much-to-do. Which does describe my day today.

So I wait, with the rest of us, for the coming of Jesus.

The best thing in the last two days was the second Advent service on Wednesday. We preached to the choir, literally. MP was annoyed - why are we doing this worship service for 15 people? (this is in a situation with average 650 for a weekend). But as I celebrated communion I just felt full - these few were good folks, they sang well, the word was preached, and the promise (the 2 or 3 together in my name) was true.
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Friday Five

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From Rev. Gal Blog Pals -

Phillipians 1:3 Every time I think of you, I give thanks to my God.

"I'm musing about giving thanks for people today, partly because Americans celebrated our annual Thanksgiving holiday yesterday (I try not to just make this holiday "turkey day" even though its main feature seems to be eating till one is nearly comatose) and partly because I read the above verse this morning. It started me thinking about individuals in my life for whom I give thanks. For this post-Thanksgiving Day Friday Five, share with us "Five People For Whom You Give Thanks to God" and maybe tell us why they are significant. "

My Five:

1. Roger - he was the best for me at a time when I really, really needed it. A father-figure and a mentor, challenging and counseling and showing the way. My own Priscilla (Acts 18:26) who taught and even better showed how Christ lives in a life. His marriage has been a model for mine.

2. Ministry Partner - I am just blessed to be working out this example of working together in ministry. I know very few people who have really experienced this kind of respect and trust in their working situations in ministry. I suspect we were separated at birth - the brother I should've had.

3. Little Sister - wow, that mind goes places I can't even fathom, and she's always present for me. Love it that she's only 4 hours away now. She's the one who doesn't see me as a pastor but just as me. We are aging well together.

4. Dear Son - this is a hard one because we have such a history - and I continue to worry and be hurt at times. But I am thankful that he's in our lives. Being his mom has forced me to grow and to grow up. I've had to learn patience and letting go, protection and vulnerability. I work on the love thing - how to love without allowing that love to be manipulated. I work on the pride/legacy/hope thing - how to lean into the future without assurance of how things will turn out.

5. Aquila - the eagle. He's still there for me. He has lived through so many changes and new versions of me, and still hangs in there. I know his sadnesses and hold them gently. He is like that eagle - very solitary and stern and unique. It's been quite a journey - this marriage. May we have many more years.

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